Not Receiving Your Heart’s Desire

All my life, I have heard many quote Psalm 37:4 (KJV), “Delight thyself also in the Lord: and He shall give thee the desires of thine heart.” Please note, I was born and raised in the church. Therefore, I have heard this scripture stated, preached, and taught for over 50 years. As I continued to grow and mature in Christ, I have heard people say, “As you draw closer to Christ and understand His will and His Word, your desires will be according to His will (and not what we want).” Another Scripture that I have heard numerous times, “And I say unto you, Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you (Luke 11:9 KJV).”

But what does one do if the only thing desired will not come to pass? The only thing desired God will not manifest. How does one continue the good fight of faith? Stay faithful and true in her calling? Not allow the disappointment to cause her to hideaway, cry, and not want to do anything else? Because for over 20+ years, she only had one desire in life. Life happened and reality HIT!

In this season of processing, I have been reflecting on past conversations the Lord has had with me. Over 20+ years earlier, the Lord had asked me, “If I never give you your heart’s desire, will you turn your back on me?” At the time He asked, it scared me. I wondered why He would ask such a question. I shared it with my husband, and he encouraged me to pray for a heart of contentment. I did just that for several months to hear the Lord ask the exact same question one year later. Therefore, I prayed again for a heart of contentment.

Now 20+ years later, I now realized what He was saying. Throughout the years, the Lord was granting my husband and I with exceedingly abundantly above all we could ask or think blessings, but I still couldn’t get past the fact that I still wasn’t getting my heart’s desire. I would say to the Lord, “Thank You for these blessings, but THIS ONE THING you are withholding from us!” I would remind Him of His Word. I would decree & declare the desire. I never wondered or doubted if He was able to do it. I just desired and believed it would happen for us.

Two years ago, the Lord placed a burdened on my heart for women who were believing God for something, but it wasn’t coming to pass as quickly as they would like. They would contact me, in anguish or despair, and say, “I am trying to stay true to Christ. I want to be obedient to His Word, but this or that has not happened for me. Therefore, I settled for something or someone.” I found myself saying, “I wish I could say something that would relieve you, but all I know is to stay true to Christ and NEVER let go of His hand. What He has for you will exceed what you choose to settle for.”

Then it was placed in my heart to do a one-day session with five other female ministers who lead women’s ministry. We agreed that our women need to be encouraged, and yet at the same time, so did we. The Lord placed in my heart, “Appreciate The Every.” It was based on Genesis 2:16-17 (KJV), “And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, Of every tree of the garden thou mayest freely eat: But of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil, thou shalt not eat of it: for in the day that thou eatest thereof thou shalt surely die.”

     What the Lord was saying to me and the ladies:

• We limit ourselves.

• We forget that what we have is more than enough!

• We listen to the Voice of Compromise… “You SHALL NOT die!” [But we act as if we will die if we DON’T HAVE!]

• We let what we see control our actions that usually leads to a ripple effect.

As I am processing the reality that I will not receive my heart’s desire, I am becoming spiritually stronger and even more content in the Lord. I close with a stanza from Pastor Smokie Norful song titled, “Dear God.”

It may not be all that I hope forAnd every dream has not yet been realizedAnd to see Your face one day, GodI know it's all gonna be worth it…

Just wanna take the time to say thank You Jesus, for my life.

Sharon D. Jones serves as Human Resource Pastor for New Hope Church of God of Waldorf, Inc and the Director of Workforce Development at New Hope Community Outreach Services, Inc.   She is a certified coach, leadership trainer, and behavioral assessor. She has a doctoral degree in Christian Leadership and Management. Sharon is a team member of COG’s International Ministry of Evangelism. She also serves on DELMARVA-DC Region’s Ministerial Internship Program, Evangelism Board, and Ministerial Care Board. Sharon has authored two books entitled, R.E.W.A.R.D. and Rise and Fall of Pastors in the 21^st Century. She also hosts “Still Waters Seminars” which provide moments of life, leisure, and laughter to pastors and ministers.